The Raucous Weekend Wrap Up
I'm sitting here, 3 weeks after The Raucous Weekend, still in awe of how "perfectly" everything unfolded. (We don't like to use the term, "perfect," here, but it was pretty damn near close!)
The Raucous Weekend was my first solo in-person event that I've ever hosted and it felt different than any other event I've ever prepared for. I wasn't racked with fear that no one would come. I didn't stress myself out over-preparing. It just brought itself together on the timeline it demanded.
The event went even better than I thought it would, and I even learned so much about being the teacher and leader I want to be through the process. Today, I want to share the experience with you, and my big takeaways from it.
Day 1 - The Awakening
While I didn't over-prepare, I had a vision for the flow of things. In order to achieve the shifts I knew each attendee had the potential to realize, I'd have to break open some uncomfortable shit in the beginning.
If you know me personally or have ever met me at another event, you probably know me as the fun, bubbly teacher who's all about empowerment and making people feel really damn good about themselves. Well on Day 1 of The Raucous Weekend, attendees were in for a bit of a surprise.
Our focus on Day 1 was to become aware of all the ways that performance health had been ruling our mindsets and keeping us from how we want to feel. Becoming aware of that shit just isn't fun. In fact, it can be downright heart-breaking.
Through our workshops and movement session, I guided the attendees to become very clear on how they view themselves and talk to themselves in the midst of struggle. Toward the end of the day, we recognized what we really want underneath what we've been told that we're supposed to want. By the end of the day, the majority of participants looked like they got hit by an emotional bus.
I'll be honest: this part is always the hardest for me. I hate seeing people struggling and some of these realizations were painful to look at for them. It took a great amount of faith and trust in myself and the work I do to stay with it instead of helping them feel better right away. It's something I'm becoming more comfortable in as a teacher.
The day ended with me taking everyone out for dinner, and I'm so glad we did. It helped to soften the edges around what opened up and allowed us to just relax into the process (myself included!). The night ended early and I fell asleep at 8:30.
From Day 1, I learned to respect the suckage. Watching everyone have their realizations and not immediately pulling them out of it, but instead trusting that they would have the experience they needed to have to truly heal all that shit, was a process for me. Day 2, however, taught me just how rewarding it can be to allow people to grow through what they go through.
Day 2 - The Revolt
Day 2 was all about revolting against what we've been taught we're supposed to be, and standing up for what we really want instead. Man, was this day a blast!
This morning, we brought everything we learned in Day 1 into forward movement by acknowledging that we didn't have to be a victim if we chose to stand up. We declared what we wanted and learned that it doesn't always look like performance health says it should, and that's f**king awesome!
One of my favorite people on the planet, Kate Marolt, who was also my co-leader at Activate Courage came in to teach a surprise yoga class in the morning. I had worked so hard to keep it a surprise, but hilariously let it slip a minute (literally) before leading her inside. I beat myself up for it a little bit, then just realized that it was more funny than anything.
Kate taught a class that focused on strength through softness. It was perfectly timed for what we were learning that day! Plus, she just brings an energy that's so welcoming and accepting. I'm so grateful she was able to come!
The rest of the day was a riot. We jammed through limiting beliefs and breaking through that shit. I taught the crew new tools for releasing old grudges, energy, beliefs and/or patterns, and I taught a helluva class that guided attendees into their personal power.
By the end of the day, everyone was feeling empowered and pumped up to create individual health on their terms and no one else's.
If I learned anything from Day 2, it was that strength looks different in everyone AND I don't need to hands-on guide them into my idea of strength. Not only were these brilliant attendees rocking each workshop and movement session in their own way, they were beginning to allow themselves to uncover what "strong" truly means for them. Not what they've been told strong is, but what they want to believe and create in their bodies and minds. It was the coolest thing to watch!
Day 3 - The Practice
On Day 1, I was really clear with everyone that to rewrite our scripts, we'd have to exert effort to do it on a daily basis. That doesn't mean pushing and forcing; it means doing what we're willing to do every day. It means looking at the issues that keep us from the lives we want and dealing with them.
Day 3 was focused on the practice of living in one's individual health without scales or judgments. I taught them tools upon tools to help them stay in the doing rather than defaulting back to performance health dictating what they should do.
The first class of the morning was yoga taught by my friend, Alison McLean. In addition to being a yoga instructor, Alison's a PT and a mom, and her values align directly with what Strong Inside Out stands for. She taught a brilliant flow class that met the attendees where they were and loosened them up for the workshops to come - both physically and mentally!
The coolest thing as a leader of this kind of event is watching the shift in your attendees. Day 3 is where it all became clear to them why each step had been necessary.
In each workshop, I taught a new tool that's practical and simple enough for each attendee to be able to do on her/his own at home. When I taught it and took volunteers through it, I could see the work working. It's the coolest thing!
By the end of the day, everyone's eyes were clearer. The hesitation that fear brought in with them at the beginning had been washed away, replaced by conviction and excitement! When I asked the room how they felt about going back to "real life" - a topic that's always a bit tough for retreats - they responded with confidence and eagerness!
After Day 3, my main lesson is actually one that I'm going to try to put into practice as a mama: you are here to bring the message to them, not to make them heed it. I'm a believer that my child is coming into this earth to have HER experience, not mine. I'm here to help her learn and grow, but not to make her do it my way.
The same thing applies to The Raucous attendees. I showed them the path and other versions of it, then let them choose for themselves what they would like to do by giving them options to use that resonated with them. All the attendees seemed to choose the path that made the most sense for them and I'm so happy to say that each person chose the forward-moving path! But it's not my duty to make them do that. When it comes down to it, I am just a messenger, not a warden.
The Takeaways
I left The Raucous Weekend with that unmistakeable feeling that this is the work I am meant to do here. These chains - that some of these attendees had been dragging around for a lifetime - were broken in 3 days. While I know that this process works, I was still amazed to witness it in every single person who came.Through the experience, I deepened my understanding of the kind of teacher and leader I want to be. Here's what I realized:
Giving your all doesn't have to mean giving too much. I kept my healthy boundaries around when I needed alone time (introvert refueling time) and when I was open to holding space. I never felt completely exhausted as I have in the past and I have a lot of my recovery to thank for that!
Connection is king. Doing the work I do virtually tends to disconnect me from the very reason I do this work: you. While I can sit here and type at you all day, my calling is being able to facilitate real change in you. The best way I know how to do that is in person like with The Raucous Weekend or one-on-one like I do with coaching.
I'm here for YOU. I'm not here to preach what I've been taught health is supposed to be. I'm here as a motherf**king WARRIOR for the person you want to be. Your health doesn't fit into a neat little box or get cut off at certain metrics like weight or calorie intake. I'm here for YOU without the balls and chains of what you've been taught you need to be to be enough. This event just rekindled that fire.
I'm already planning next year's Raucous Weekend and am even more confident now that I've been through the experience. Thank you to everyone who attended. I learned so much from every one of you, and the event is just gonna keep getting better and better from here thanks to your feedback!
If you want in on The Raucous Weekend in Fall 2019, sign up for the wait list here!
To think that I'll have a baby by the time the next Raucous Weekend rolls around is crazy to me! I can't wait to show her through example just how strong she can be (and you, too).
Hugs n' fist bumps,
Amy