The Downlow on Pushing Yourself & How to Do It In A Healthy Way

I'm ba-aaaack! Oh man was that extra couple of months of maternity leave necessary. Thanks for your patience, boo. I feel like myself again! Or...like this new self I've become. Speaking of which...

If you've been browsing the body positive/inclusive wellness space, you may have gotten the idea that workouts always have to "honor your body" (aka not be hard). There's this notion that pushing yourself and getting uncomfortable is harmful because it's rooted in the drive to be enough.

I'm here to tell you it isn't...not always anyways. It's more complicated than that. Don't fret, though: I'm breaking it all down for you today.

To better illustrate when pushing yourself is healthy and when it's not, I'm gonna get a little personal. Here's my story.

My Experience

After giving birth, it took me a solid few months to get back into the kinds of workouts that I was doing regularly before I got knocked up. And that was on purpose.

I took it slow as I ramped back up to running so that I wouldn't re-injure my knee. I cut my weight, reps and sets down in the gym as my muscles got used to lifting again so I wouldn't get crazy sore and wanna give up. Honoring my body and where it was at was paramount for me, and that required that I stay well within my comfort zone. *pats self on back for taking recovered action*

Then, a month or so ago after I'd made a bunch of progress in running and at the gym, I realized that I wasn't getting the emotional payoff I usually seek from moving my body. I wasn't smiling during my workouts anymore; I was just getting through them. And afterwards, I just kinda felt meh, not as lifted as I like to feel after doing movement.

After some reflection, I realized that I missed pushing myself.

But I was afraid that pushing myself meant that I was giving in to old disordered motivations; like pushing was synonymous with not honoring my body.

Then I got to thinking: if my body and mind are truly craving the push, is it actually not honoring my body to deprive myself of it?

So I decided to play around with pushing again. I'm not talking about pushing myself so hard I risked injury or burn out; I'm talking about going a bit faster on the last 5 minutes of my run, or seeing if I can eek out a couple more reps on those deadlifts.

Surprise surprise, I started feeling that emotional release and post-movement high again! Not only that, but I've rediscovered the fun that comes from not knowing if I'm going to be able to do something. Honestly, at this point 6 months post-birth, I'm failing quite a bit. And guess what: I'M NOT DYING. I'm at the point now where failing is funny; I actually chuckle a little when I push myself and realize that nope, that's not for me today. You know what's really fun? Realizing I can do something I used to be able to do again. Woot!

The difference between getting caught in the trap of pushing from a disordered place and never pushing at all for fear of pushing from that disordered place comes down to the connection we feel when we decide whether or not to push.

The Difference Between Connected & Disconnected Pushing

Growing up in a world where fitness was largely performance health-based, I used to believe that "pushing yourself" is something that you should always do without fail in every workout. When I got into this anti-performance health space, I went the complete opposite direction where "pushing yourself" was synonymous with "not listening to your body."

Now that I've spent plenty of time doing both, I'm back in balance and I've realized that pushing yourself is neither something to avoid or aim for all the time. It comes down to the connection you feel to your body and yourself while you do it.

Pushing your comfort zone can – like most things in health + wellness – come from a place of disconnected, performance health-driven never-enoughness. OR it can come from a deeply connected place of exploring the discomfort, celebrating your progress, just wanting to get the yuck energy OUUUUUUUUT, the thrill of trying something new, or a whole bunch of other reasons that aren't enoughness-centered.

What's important for you to keep in mind while you push yourself is the drive behind it.

Are you pushing yourself because you think that's what you're supposed to do (disconnected), or are you pushing yourself because YOU want to (connected)?

And hey, if you don't know, that's cool. Journaling a little bit after your workout can help you get clear on the why behind the push. Just jot down how you feel, why you feel that way, and what (if anything) to do differently next time.

One last thing to keep in mind: no one is connected all the time. Aiming for that kind of perfection is just aiming for disappointment, so be gentle with yourself. As long as you're aiming for connection more of the time, you're on the right path!

Whether you're just starting out on the journey of honoring your body with movement or you're a seasoned pro, aiming to get more connected during your workouts is something you'll reap benefits from. Not only will it make your movement sesh more enjoyable, it'll help you avoid injury and burn out. And if you're in this place of wanting to honor your body, chances are you know what not honoring your body feels like! Blegh.

Thanks for allowing me to be part of that journey, wherever you are on it. Hit me up if you have any questions!

Sweaty hugs,

Amy