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Wallflowers Unite: Let’s Selfishly Change The World (Challenge)

perksofbeingawallflower

First off, let me just say that I was blown away by the response from the last post.

At least one person from every single city on the list except for Austin, Seattle and Orlando reached out to try to coordinate a space for The 30×30 Bootcamp.

I don’t know if you guys realize just how grateful I am to have you in my community. This movement is you! I just am in awe of all the kindness and encouragement from you all. Thank you.

On another note… I watched Perks of Being A Wallflower this weekend and, though beautifully done, I don’t think I’ll be watching it anytime again soon.

The way the movie illustrates the lives of teens who struggle with bullying, mental illness, abuse and other debilitating issues that are all too familiar was spot on. So spot on, in fact, that it actually served as a trigger for me. I wouldn’t recommend that people who are easily triggered watch this film; I don’t consider myself easily triggered anymore, and I was anyway.

I didn’t expect to feel so overwhelmed by a movie, but at the end (and I won’t ruin it for you), I lost it.

I haven’t cried that hard in quite a while.

The very real pain that these teens face, trying to find their way and getting pushed into silence when they start feeling lost, thinking that they can’t reach out for fear of retaliation and isolation is visceral in this movie. It transported me right back into those times when I felt that way.

Every day, teens swallow their words of despair because they’re not supposed to struggle. They’re supposed to be strong, they’re supposed to handle all the pressure of the rest of their lives with grace, even though they have never had the experience of learning to cope with it.

Adults, too. We hold our struggle in with Spanx-like tenacity, as if allowing ourselves to leak a little here and there to reduce the pressure would cause a full deluge of unstoppable magnitudes. We struggle, all of us do, and then we pretend like our struggles are unworthy or not as important as others’. We blind ourselves to pain until it builds and builds into an impermeable anchor holding us in the stagnation of numbness, because we just can’t handle any more feeling

One of the most important things we can do for those who are silent, is to let them know that we’re here and to share our stories to let them know they’re not alone. We have to be brave so that they can feel safe coming out of hiding.

So what’s my action step for this post? It’s a simple challenge:

You know someone who needs support. Everyone does. This week, let someone know you’re here for them, even if they didn’t ask.

Being there for someone can help you feel better, too. I’m not talking about commiserating. I’m talking about co-motivating.

Motivate him/her, and you will motivate yourself. Chances are, you’ll want to start leading by example or working alongside this person to get stronger from within for yourself.

Helping others helps you. It sounds hippie-dippie, but I promise: this is no green peace effort to make the world a better place. This can actually be a selfish act… in a good way.

Those who are helped want to help the helpers. Creating that support system for yourself is very important. To get the kind of support you want, you need to give that same support to your supporters.

As I said at the beginning of this post, this movement is you. There’s only so much I can do from my computer. The rest is up to this amazing community that’s growing every single day.

Let’s change the world, guys… if only for selfish reasons. ;)

Tweet if you’re in.

*****

We’re booking up more locations as I speak, but still looking for a spot in Austin, Orlando and Seattle. If anyone has any contacts for a location and community that would be interested, please speak up! I’d love to come teach my bootcamp and spread this movement to your town.

This week is a hectic one with my workout video shoot this weekend, and tour finalizations, but I’m so happy to be here doing this with you guys. This experience has proven to me how strong we are as a group. My faith in humanity is officially confirmed. :)

‘Til next time, guys, you know the drill:

Stay strong,

Amy

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8 Responses to “Wallflowers Unite: Let’s Selfishly Change The World (Challenge)”

  1. bridget navoda says:

    I live in Round Rock — Austin area — You might ping the GenAustin – @GENaustin on twitter. If they’ve got a place, I can give time to help host on a Saturday or Sunday.

    Great movement. Bridget

    • Amy says:

      Thanks so much for that lead, Bridget! Just tweeted them. What a wonderful cause!

      I really appreciate your offer to help, too. I could really use it! :)

  2. Cielle says:

    Hey! I live in Seattle, but I moved here recently. Don’t know of any locations or many people. If you do get it to work though, I can volunteer my time!

  3. Gareth says:

    Like you say Amy, such depictions can so easily hit a raw nerve if you’ve experienced similar struggles. Here in the UK one TV channel in particular seems to have a penchant for OCD inspired documentaries; which for me is far too close to psychological home for comfort. What I find most disturbing however, is that these documentaries seem more interested in propagating some form of perverse voyeurism regarding mental health issues, rather than attempting to deepen public understanding.

    And I’ll back you up on your hippie-dippie assertion that altruism brings happiness. Research has shown that people are happier when they spend money on a gift for others instead of themselves; and even that victims of natural disasters gain a tremendous amount of emotional strength from helping their fellow victims.

    I’m so pleased you had such a positive response to your last post too. Keep the momentum going…full stream ahead :-)

    • Amy says:

      I understand where you’re coming from. When As Good As It Gets came out, I couldn’t watch it. It made me feel really uncomfortable and demeaned.

      Almost there, Gareth! We’re up to about 20 now! :)

  4. Dawn says:

    I always seem to reach out to those who need it. You can tell how much someone needs to feel that they matter…a touch a kind word what ever it takes. Congrats to you! We all need to reach out, even if you are struggling yourself, when you reach out to someone who needs a little bit of affirmation it means the world to them, and gives you so much more in return!

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