How to Reconnect
Before I left for Costa Rica 2 weeks ago, I was starting to get a little worried.
I felt disconnected from everything.
My friends. My boyfriend. My clients.
I started to worry because disconnection is one of the warning signs for depression. Recognizing that, I knew exactly what to do to nip it in the bud.
These tried and true methods of reconnecting helped me this time and in the past. Hopefully they can help you, too!
My Tried & True Steps To Reconnect
Open Up
The first step I took was to start talking to people about the way I was feeling. My friends and loved ones assured me that they understood how I was feeling and were there to listen when I needed them.
They offered the support I needed in a time when I felt like I lacked control. Sometimes, just that support can be enough to help pull you out.
I also called up my therapist and made an appointment. Talking to her helped me gain perspective on the situation.
I am one of the biggest proponents of therapy out there for a reason: therapy was one of the most vital factors of my recovery from my lowest point. Talking to an educated professional that has gone through almost a decade of school just to learn how to help you is extremely beneficial.
Get Creative
The only thing I felt I could connect to was this blog. Through writing, I felt I could finally connect to my passion, my emotions, and my actual aliveness.
Find something you’re passionate about–even if you don’t feel very passionate at the moment–and do it. Starting off, it may feel like you’re just going through the motions, but more often than not, that spark will flare up again and catch up with you.
If you’re drawing a blank on how to get creative, here are some ideas:
•drawing
•painting
•writing
•running
•singing
•dancing
•knitting
•collage-ing
•scrap booking
By taking part in any of these activities (as long as you’re enjoying it) you are opening yourself up by expressing your emotions. I don’t care if I sound like a middle school art teacher right now. Sometimes you just need a catalyst to start feeling again.
Take Your Time
In Costa Rica, I had the luxury of not having to be anywhere besides my daily surf lesson. Even that I could have skipped if I wanted to.
I found myself taking a lot of siestas, reading, and just watching the sun set. This time to myself allowed me to rediscover how I was feeling, good or bad.
Take time to be alone. Listen to yourself.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind that is life and get carried away in nonessential thoughts and worries. Ground yourself in the moment.
Here’s how:
•Take a moment by yourself and just sit.
•Close your eyes.
•Take a few deep breaths.
•Just feel what you’re feeling without trying to change it.
Noticing your present emotions will automatically bring you into the moment, whether they’re good or bad. If they’re bad, at least now you have the presence to deal with them. If they’re good, go celebrate! You’re connected now so you can actually enjoy these feelings!
*****
Now that I’m back, I feel much more connected to those around me and the work that I do, but I know that this disconnection may crop up again with no warning.
Having these tools in your tool belt will provide you with an easy, worry-free method to reconnect to your daily life., and can keep you from spiraling further downwards at which point it’s more difficult to pull yourself back up.
Catch it early and reconnect to yourself as fast as possible.
After all, what’s the point of life if you don’t feel it?
photo 1 taken by Kirsten Kuiken, photo 2 (of Kirsten and me) and 4 by yours truly, photo 3 by Rafa Sandoval
6 Responses to “How to Reconnect”
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Love the pics. Looks you did score a few nice days in Tamarindo. I loved sitting at the bar at Witch’s right after I got out of the water and just writing for a few hours. Some of the groundwork for much of what I have going was started at that bar.
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Even when it was raining, it was a nice day down there! I did most of my writing in the early morning down at Joe’s- it’s so peaceful to be able to look out at the ocean as I work. That picture of me on my computer was a surprise from Rafa- I didn’t know he was taking it!
Hi Amy,
Great post! I used to hesitate to say anything when I was down but in the last few years have opened up quite a bit (almost out of necessity!). I have been pleasantly surprised how receptive friends are to hearing me out and offering support. Good for you for heading straight to therapy. I’m still working on finding a therapist that works for me.
Hey Amy! So nice to see you here!
I used to hide my depression, too. It actually wasn’t until I started taking action against it and empowering myself to overcome it that I started telling other people about it. I too was surprised about how supportive everyone was once they fully understood my situation.
Therapy is my splurge- I don’t care if I’m feeling like there’s nothing wrong, I always go every other week. There’s always room for growth!
I have been to many different therapists in my life, and I would only return to three of them. Finding a therapist is like dating- there’s someone out there for everyone! If you need help with qualities to look for or just need a sounding board, email me! I’d be happy to help!
Thanks for remaining connected to your blog and us! Glad CR was a good way to recharge. If we could only stay alive at all times and be continually connected to life !?!
Therapy is a great suggestion and super helpful (but so taboo). Any thoughts on if local therapists collectively ban you from seeing them? Oh, a friend was asking…
Tell your “friend” that I don’t think therapists band together to not help someone! ;)
Staying connected to this community is so important to me and, luckily, it’s what I’m passionate about. It’s staying connected to life when it threatens to overwhelm that is the difficult part! Using these tips, I’ve been able to do that even in busy-busy LA.